I was going to open this article with something like WWE presents BOTCHLASH! but the event wasn’t even worth crappy word-play so let’s move on…
1. It’s Only That Crazy Foreign Wrestlemania Crowd That Chants Bad Things During Reigns Matches
You’d think after all those great matches together Joe vs. Reigns couldn’t miss but ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN IN THE WWE. A crowd allergic to the taste of Reigns and unhappy with clear favorite Joe wrestling a deliberately boring style in order to draw boos resulted in ”BORING”, ”DELETE”, ”RUSEV DAY”, and new favorite ”BEAT THE TRAFFIC” chants. Joe (like creative) didn’t care, which only made him more cheerable.
2. Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time
What’s that old joke about the guy complaining about having a headache so his mate kicks him in the shin to take his mind off the headache? Well in case you haven’t heard it, AJ Styles blocked a Kinshasa by bouncing a chair off his own head.
Unrelated, AJ Styles didn’t win.
3. THE BIGGER THE PUSHIN’, THE SWEETER THE COUSIN CUSHION
”hey.”
”what?”
”shall we move the BIG above the CASS so it doesn’t look like BIG ASS when he makes his entrance?
”naaaah too much work, leave it as it is.”
4. Those Sit-Down Interviews With Jim Ross Only Worked When The Dude Had A Personality And Was A Heel
Only WWE would re-hire Bobby Lashley after he’d been an entertaining bad guy in TNA for years to have him be the same, dull charisma-vacuum he was 10 years ago. Maybe they realized this as they were struggling to edit it and decided to fill the segments with lies and hyperbole (if you missed it, it’s after the bit about saving kittens from burning houses) to flat-out say Lashley headlined WrestleMania 23.
His match against Umaga was a main event for sure (but only because future President-what’s-his-name was involved), but there was only one headline match that night and it did not involve the then-ECW Champion.
I probably shouldn’t have to point this out given it was the most-bought Wrestlemania until Rock vs. Cena but next week they’ll be reminding people when he slammed Andre The Giant so it’s best to nip it at the bud.
5. Un-Break My Table, Say You’ll Love Me Again
@Maffewgregg – that table was never breaking at @RIPTIDEwres pic.twitter.com/eadSt2BjqK
— Karl Luckhurst (@oddjob88) May 4, 2018
I know without clicking that link there’s already going to be a dozen replies saying things like TAKE THAT FEMINIST or some other try-hard stuff but I don’t see gender or shape or size. To me, all tables are equal (as long as they’re not breaking).
Thanks for reading, follow me on Twitter or actually go follow Jimmy Havoc instead, he’s much cooler than me.
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