We didn’t have to wait long to find out what lay ahead on this week’s SmackDown Live, as the ultimate WWE insider (its Twitter account) revealed some major matches booked for the show.
Included in this revelatory piece of investigative tweet-alism was news that not only would Bayley, Becky, Charlotte and Lacey Evans be facing off in the ring, but also that Kofi Kingston would be taking on Sami Zayn. Oh, and Roman Reigns would be appearing on the blue brand. Hold on, isn’t he a Raw star?
But it’s those first two points in particular that separate SmackDown from its Monday night counterpart, to the point that it’s hard to believe that they’re crafted by the same minds. Whereas Raw seems content to throw all of its women onto talk shows hosted by Alexa Bliss – and then just as quickly toss them into forgettable six-person tag bouts – SmackDown has larger plans at work. It’s as if it was all leading somewhere. Like a storyline of some sort.
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Still not convinced? Look no further than the different personas of one Samuel J. Zayn. On Raw, he gets deposited in the trash. On SmackDown he’s placed in the main event. Monday nights see him transform into Braun Strowman’s personal jobber. Tuesday nights have him compete for the brand’s top belt. It’s a regular Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde… from Braun in most cases.
And I’ve almost forgotten the best part of last night’s SmackDown. The blue brand may not have a Beast in the Bank, but it did receive a big, delicious helping of Big Delicious E. And, on that note, let’s get to the review.
The Best of SmackDown Live
Big E is Back!
Never before have I been so excited to see the return of someone who had only been absent for six weeks.
New Day have been wrapped up in an uncharacteristically serious narrative of late, with Kevin Owens posing a near existential threat to the stable. And that’s not a criticism. It’s provided a welcome change of pace for the goofy group, presenting Kofi Kingston as a serious champion ready to confront the violence and malice of his challenger head-on.
But the reintroduction of Big E brought with it a welcome return to the group’s origins. There was a Big E imposter hidden beneath a curtain, references to Big E’s fire Twitter game (and weird obsession with Becky Lynch’s attractive mom), and… armpit sniffing. I’m not delving into more detail on any of those.
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The reunion was cut short first by Kevin Owens and then by Sami Zayn, who contrasted Big E’s reception after injury with his own (ignoring that Sami in fact received a tremendous ovation on return last month). But it all served a purpose of hyping up the contest between Sami and Kofi, set up for later in the night. There was a weird moment immediately after Zayn came out, where KO turned his back on his pal and marched off. These two only reunited last week, so to already sow the seeds of disfunction seems a bit premature.
Legally Blonde III
For those who missed Monday’s Raw, Mick Foley introduced the company’s newest championship, which can change hands anywhere at any time. As the stipulation may suggest, the 24/7 Title has already changed holders three times in its short lifespan. I can, however, already confirm unequivocally that R-Truth is the best 24/7 Champion we’ve ever seen.
On last night’s show, Truth was seemingly trying to keep a low profile by disguising himself as Nikki Minaj after a long night. In other words, he was wearing a cheap blonde wig. Carmella stumbled across him in the hallway and after some light comedy, agreed to help keep him safe for the night.
.@RuPaulsDragRace Season 12?
He's serving looks, henny. #SDLive @RonKillings @CarmellaWWE pic.twitter.com/ESglRP7QL9
— WWE (@WWE) May 22, 2019
This led to typical Truth / Carmella silliness, as Truth went ever further undercover – even donning a hat and bra. He then accompanied Carmella to her match against Mandy Rose. Because sometimes the best place to hide is in plain sight. And sometimes hanging around the ring with a belt that can be won at any time causes the entire undercard to storm out, forcing you to make a quick getaway with Carmella on your back. R-Truth then spent the rest of the night attempting to dodge people coming after his title.
I loved this. Every part of it was ludicrous, but I loved it.
Andrade vs Ali
In a battle of the man who lost his surname against the man who lost his first name, Ali emerged victorious.
This match followed a similar pattern to Cesaro vs Ricochet from the night before, with Ali nursing a lingering back injury from Money in the Bank and Andrade looking to take advantage at every turn.
HASN'T HE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH?!? #SDLive @AliWWE @AndradeCienWWE pic.twitter.com/X0yQ8X9LSd
— WWE Universe (@WWEUniverse) May 22, 2019
This was a good encounter, as Andrade took the ascendency early and sought to wear Ali down. Just as things looked to be over for the former cruiserweight though, Ali rolled Andrade up with a small package to secure the pin.
Becky and Bayley vs Charlotte and Lacey
It was interesting seeing all of Raw and SmackDown’s top female talent in the ring together. And suitably, Becky, Bayley, Charlotte and Lacey Evans lived up to the hype. This was a decent tag match, with everyone getting their licks in.
Becky looked to have the match won with the Disarm-her on Charlotte, before Lacey clocked her with the Woman’s Right. Bayley then dispatched Evans before countering Charlotte into the roll-up pin for the victory. Everyone was made to look good and Bayley – as the newly crowned SmackDown Women’s Champ – continued to gather momentum with another win over Charlotte.
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WWE’s Video Editors
Triple H and Randy Orton apparently have a match scheduled for Super ShowDown, which has received absolutely no build whatsoever. In fact, I don’t even think it’s been mentioned until last night.
Well, enter WWE’s editing team, who stitched together an excellent video package covering the highlights of the pair’s on-again, off-again feud dating back over a decade. This was another example of excellent promo work, following a similar package that was put together ahead of Becky and Charlotte’s encounter at Money in the Bank. Really good work.
Elias vs Reigns II: Electric Boogaloo
Of all the possible Money in the Bank rematches, SmackDown chose Reigns vs Elias.
I have no idea why Elias merited a rematch after being decisively squashed by Reigns just two nights earlier, but trying to explain WWE’s booking choices is much like wrestling Roman Reigns: you’ll look good for about 90% of the way, but ultimately come out with a loss.
Either way, Shane was at ringside this time to try and further stack the odds against the ‘Big Dog’, who eventually managed to overcome the dastardly heels to pick up the win. He then superman punched Shane, before turning into a Claymore from the suddenly materialised Drew McIntyre. You should know that Shane always has another mid-carder up his sleeve.
Despite the questionable build-up, this match was largely fine and adequately served to advance Roman’s issues with Shane and McIntyre, leading to the Reigns / Shane encounter scheduled for Super ShowDown.
.@ShaneMcMahon's getting his money's worth with his new insurance policy, @DMcInytreWWE. #SDLive #RomansvsElias @WWERomanReigns pic.twitter.com/Vz0xeIhcJz
— WWE (@WWE) May 22, 2019
The Worst of SmackDown Live
Big E’s Injury
On the same night that he returned, Big E was attacked backstage. As people rushed to his aid, Big E claimed that Kevin Owens was the perpetrator.
This served to enrage Kofi ahead of his match against Sami Zayn, but otherwise this angle went absolutely nowhere. Absent any immediate payoff, it’s hard to see the purpose behind all of this.
The Briefcase without the Beast
Kofi continued his good run with a competitive win over Sami Zayn. That was fine, perhaps even good, but things quickly deteriorated from there.
Immediately after the win, Paul Heyman appeared on the ramp holding Brock Lesnar’s boombox – sorry, I meant briefcase. He then proceeded to awkwardly tease opening it, while Kofi just as awkwardly pretended to be concerned about a possible Lesnar sneak attack. This was unnecessary and wholly ineffective. Nobody in that building believed that Brock Lesnar was actually going to appear on SmackDown last night. The pantomime acting just made it all the worse.
UH OH.
Is @BrockLesnar gonna cash in tonight?!? #MITB #SDLive @HeymanHustle @TrueKofi pic.twitter.com/N5xVvtfLGr
— WWE (@WWE) May 22, 2019
Also, apparently we’re meant to believe that Kofi was so hyper-aware of a potential attack from Brock that he missed the guy who actually did sneak up on him. This was hard to fathom – surely if you’re planning to blindside the champion, you don’t have a little man with a golden briefcase announce it beforehand.
The Return of Dolph
Here’s sentence that I’ve said way too often over the last five years: Dolph Ziggler is back.
Ziggles attacked Kofi from behind following his match with Sami Zayn, beating him down before wrapping a chair around the champion’s head and repeatedly stomping on it. This might have been an impactful moment, had I not already lost interest in all things Dolph many years ago. And apparently I’m not alone, as the audience was largely silent throughout this attack. Although I’m fairly sure Tom Phillips mentioned something about the silence being of a stunned variety. I’m not buying it.
This is too far, @HEELZiggler. #SDLive @TrueKofi pic.twitter.com/u36EX1TrwL
— WWE Universe (@WWEUniverse) May 22, 2019
Kofi was stretchered away by medical personnel, indicating that he may – in kayfabe – have suffered a severe injury. Halfway up the ramp though, the proud champion fought his way off the stretcher, staggered to his feet, grabbed his title and painfully stumbled to the back.
While Kofi was made to look strong in the post-attack angle, everything that preceded it was completely lacklustre. I didn’t care for Heyman’s obvious ploy, nor Dolph Ziggler’s blindside on return. And the prospect of a protracted title program between Kingston and Ziggler is wholly unappealing. Like, on every level.
Is Ziggler the Culprit?
This deserves a category all of its own. But if it transpires that Dolph Ziggler attacked Sami Zayn backstage ahead of Money in the Bank, and is now secretly in cahoots with Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman, I’m going to be really annoyed.
Why Dolph, why?
Having brutally dispatched of Kofi, Ziggler came out to explain his actions. He claimed that Kofi’s opportunities, his rise to stardom, his success at WrestleMania, all of that should have been Dolph’s for some reason. Yeah, I didn’t quite get it either.
I have to admit though, the ‘Showoff’ demonstrated a noticeable measure of vulnerability here – even desperation. His overwhelming need to be appreciated, to be cheered by the WWE fans, was almost tangible. Dolph’s delivery was emotional, powerful and generally excellent.
The problem is that I just don’t care any more. As much as I hate to say it. We’ve seen all this from Dolph many times before: a revamped character, passionate promo delivery and promising change. Only for it all to be flushed away through drawn-out feuds, 50/50 booking and repetitive angles.
Anyway, he confirmed that he’ll be facing Kofi at Super ShowDown for the WWE Championship.
Overall Rating of the Show (From best to worst: SmackDamn, SmackTastic, Smack Bang in the Middle, SmackDowner and A Smack in the Face)
There was only one true blemish on this week’s SmackDown Live, although you wouldn’t have known it judging from the lack of crowd reaction. Unfortunately, so much time was devoted to this one angle that I found myself starting to get bored around the show’s midpoint.
Of course, I’m talking about the return of Dolph Ziggler, who spent a large chunk of the show setting up the most super of showdowns (see what I did there?) with Kofi Kingston, only to then to attempt to justify that very match to an unreceptive crowd. Even worse, the strong suggestion is that Dolph was behind the attack on Sami Zayn on Sunday and has now aligned himself with Paul Heyman. Which would somehow be an even more obvious yet disappointing twist than when the Gobbledy Gooker emerged from that giant egg.
He has no choice. @HEELZiggler HAS to challenge @TrueKofi for the #WWETitle at #WWESSD. #SDLive pic.twitter.com/Lu2bDvtzT2
— WWE (@WWE) May 22, 2019
Elsewhere though, this was an excellent night of WWE programming. Big E made a welcome return from injury to reignite some New Day chicanery alongside Kofi and Xavier Woods. The 24/7 Championship suddenly feels like a legitimate comedy tool in the capable hands of R-Truth and Carmella. And both of Andrade and Ali, as well as Becky, Bayley, Charlotte and Lacey Evans, put on some high quality wrestling.
On a week that could have been great then, SmackDown will sadly have to settle for merely very good. This instalment of the blue brand was SmackTastic.
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